Floor Plan Porn: Drew Barrymore

Back in May (2013) Your Mama prattled on about the purdy Montecito, CA estate that child star turned powerhouse movie producer Drew Barrymore and her well born art consultant hubby Will Kopelman listed with an asking price of $7,500,000.

The two-ish acre spread remains on the open market at $7.5 million but, thanks to a succinctly spoken little birdie we'll call Monty Seetoh, we've learned that the floor plans for the spacious but understated 6200+ square foot multi-winged main house and its couple of garages/outbuildings are now included with online marketing materials.

In addition to the sprawling master suite and five guest/family bedrooms in the main house—each with small, private bathroom—the floor plan shows three fireplaces (living room, library, master bedroom), a compact powder room off the foyer, a walk-in pantry in the kitchen and more closets, cabinets and built-in shelves that even a hoarder like Your Mama would know what to do with.

We happen to think this house with it's meandering layout is kind of the cat's meow but we'd still make a few subtle changes including a minor reconfiguration (and renovation) of the kitchen that would open it to the breakfast room and allow for a less clunky access to the backyard areas. We might also add a dining terrace and discreet built-in barbecue just outside the kitchen/breakfast area.

We'd also flop the bathroom between bedrooms two and three so that the larger bedroom has direct access to the bathroom and that the smaller bedroom—a perfect home office since it has direct access through French doors to the secondary motor court and garages—would then make use of the bathroom across the hall.

listing photo and floor plan: Sotheby's International Realty

Miami Real Estate Housing Market: Making an Impression Can Lead to Rapid Sales

There is actually an increase of list of homes for sale, in a time when the Miami real estate market is seen of reducing its speed.
Proper pricing is vital but in making a good impression to buyers is an advantage. Excellent first impression can lead to rapid sales. There are some tips to regard as in order to have that excellent impression among buyers and in order to go ahead in the Miami real estate housing selling market.
Let us visit and look at the toilet and bathroom. Now, it is better to make sure that the toilet and bathroom are clean and spot-free. Make sure to remove or eliminate the leaks in the shower, in the sink, tub and toilet. Mirrors should also be clean, it should look shiny. Also make sure that there are no mess on the countertops and shower stalls. And to make the bathroom more striking, you should put clean towels that match the color and style of the bathroom. In this way, the potential buyer will be attracted and will have a good impression with the toilet and bathroom.
Now let us go to the kitchen. Actually the kitchen is the most important selling points in any house in Miami home selling market ever listed. Better to minimized the mess in the kitchen, it is wiser to get rid of the unnecessary things in the kitchen. Is also advisable to eliminate the strange odor in the kitchen, it would be better to clean the curtains and towels before the potential buyer will pay a visit to your home.
Next, it to make the closest looks wider as possible. So better to remove your things and just packed them up. In doing so, you could make the closest look wider and spacious.
Let's move to the garages and basements. It is wiser to make these look wider and spacious too. So better to put the unused things and tools in the boxes, so not to accumulate all the space in the garages or basements, in doing so, the potential buyer would see the amount of space the basements and garages really has. Actually a messy free garages and basements can give an excellent impression to potential buyers.
Now in terms of the living room, it is more appealing to matches all the decors and design of your living room. Mess should also be removed in and make sue that everything is clean. Remove all the unnecessary things in the room and just leave those furniture and design that could attract the potential buyer. Make sure not to over crowd the room, make it comfortable and pleasant for the buyer, this again will make a great impression to the buyer.
Another place to look up is the bedroom. It is great to leave the furniture behind to make the room more attractive but make sure that it is not again overcrowded. Make sure to make it look wider and spacious. And make sure to put clean bed sheets, blankets and well arranged pillow. Also make sure that the mess is eliminated. In doing all this can make a favorable impression which is needed in selling a home.
An excellent fist impression is very important and needed in making a home sell. So in making sure that the house is clean, mess-free is an advantage. In doing and considering the tips mentioned could works as a competitive advantage in making a rapid sale in Miami real estate housing market.

Actor Kristoffer Polaha sells Toluca Lake

SELLER: Kristoffer Polaha
LOCATION: Toluca Lake, CA
PRICE: $820,000
SIZE: 1,874 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 2.5 bathrooms

NOTE FROM YOUR MAMA: Listen, chickens, we have a bit of an unexpected medical situation with Sister Woman that we have to attend to so we gonna be very brief today and possibly the next few days, depending on how things go...

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Actor Kristoffer Polaha has sold his modestly scaled and partly 1930s stucco bungalow in L.A.'s star-studded Toluca Lake area for $820,000.

Before any of y'all get your feathers in a ruffle, Your Mama had no idea who Mister Polaha is either. He certainly isn't a household name on the order of, say, Brad Pitt or Channing Tatum but he's none-the-less appeared in several dozen movies and television programs, most notably Ringer, Life Unexpected and Miss Guided—all canceled. He's also popped up on Mad Men and Made In Jersey and will soon be seen on the upcoming boob-toob show Dating in L.A. and Other Urban Myths and in the movie Vineland. Mister Polaha his married to (former) soap story actress Julianne Morris (Days of Our Lives, The Young and the Restless) and together they have three young children.

Property records show the house was purchased by Miz Moore in February 2001 for $479,500 and at Mister Polaha was added to the deeds and documents sometime after they were married in 2003. Online resources indicate the long-time Tinseltowners tangled with the threat foreclosure a couple of times between 2009 and 2011 but all signs point to them having got all that ugly business worked out long before they listed the property in March 2013 with an asking price of $847,000.

Listing details show the single story residence, on pretty, tree-lined street just off busy Riverside Drive just a few blocks from the heart of the Toluca Lake shopping and dining district, has three bedrooms and 2.5 bathrooms in 1,874 square feet of partly remodeled interior space.

Pale blond hardwood floor run throughout the house including in the taupe-walled living room where a marble-faced fireplace is flanked by decorative windows and both open and closed shelving/storage. The dining room, with glass-fronted built-ins and a long bench that serves as seating along one long side of a gorgeous Nakashima-esque dining table, is open to one end of the remodeled, galley style kitchen that's fitted with white Shaker-style cabinetry, engineered stone counter tops Carrara tile back splashes, a stainless steel farmhouse sink, and medium-grade stainless steel appliances. French doors on one end open to the front porch and a sunshine yellow dutch door in the laundry area at the opposite end connects through to the back yard

The master bedroom is unexpectedly spacious (and under-furnished) with vaulted ceiling, corner (gas) fireplace surmounted by a big ol' flat screen, French doors that grant backyard access. The gray and white tiled master bathroom looks like it might have been redone in the 1980s and the main hall bathroom looks to Your Mama like the turquoise and lemon yellow tile might be original to the house.

Mature trees ring the large (if ratty) backyard and obstruct sight lines from the multi-story apartment houses that wrap around two sides of the property.

A quick search of the various property record data bases that Your Mama regularly consults does not turn up any other property owned by Mister Polaha and Miz Moore but, of course, that doesn't mean they down own any other property.

listing photos: John Aaroe Group

David Katzenberg Sells Sunset Strip Digs To Josh Flagg

SELLER: David Katzenberg
BUYER: Josh Flagg
LOCATION: Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $1,600,000
SIZE: 1,687 square feet, 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Back in January (2013) Hollywood scion David Katzenberg—his daddy is DreamWorks Animation CEO Jeffrey Katzenberg, in case you didn't know—quietly acquired a multi-million dollar micro-estate above the Sunset Strip and this week the fast-budding writer/director/producer sold his Sunset Strip starter house for—we heard from an impeccable source—$1.6 million to—drum roll, please—Million Dollar Listing bad boy Josh Flagg.

Property records show 30-year old and newly single Mister Katzenberg—he and hotel heiress/handbag designer Nicky Hilton recently parted ways after four years—acquired the 1935 Spanish bungalow in June 2006, for $1,550,000. We're not sure when he first floated it but Your Mama found digital evidence the property was previously available for what appears to have been an off-market listing with a $1,959,000 asking price. The fully updated, upgraded and carefully maintained property popped up on the open market in mid-April (2013) for $1,595,000 and was removed from the market about a month later. The $1.6 million sale price now reflected in various property record data bases suggests—but does not prove, children—there were multiple offers for the modestly scaled but centrally located residence.

Technically the Katzenberg-Flagg house is in West Hollywood but, kittens and caboodles, it's really so close to the eastern border of Beverly Hills that some real estate agents might dare to describe it as—ahem—Beverly Hills adjacent. Although it's generally true that nobody walks in L.A.—not even across the damn street if it can be avoided—Mister Flagg could, if he was so inclined, put on a pair of those embroidered Tuxedo-style slipper-shoes of which he's so fond and easily amble over to the members only Soho House that's just down the block and across Sunset Boulevard. Your Mama generally feels wary about member's only clubs but it so happens, thanks to a prominent real estate agent with whom we're acquainted, Your Mama has been to the Soho House and, children, the glass-railed and tree-shaded roof top dining terrace is about as good a swanky spot as any in L.A. to see and be seen iffin seeing and being seen floats yer boat. Anyhoo...

Mister Flagg's new digs, which Your Mama just assume he's gonna share with his interior decorating man-mate Colton Thorn, are all but hidden behind high privet hedges and security gates and listing details Your Mama scared up on the internet show the 1,687 square foot house has but two bedrooms and two (renovated) bathrooms.

Listing photographs show dark stained wood floors in the sunken living/dining room that shimmer in the southeast sunshine that streams though the paned windows that are hung with the most humble of bamboo shades. Architectural detailing has been pared back, eliminated, or otherwise neutralized but the room retains a welcomed smidgen of its original architectural language with the arched red brick fireplace. Mister Katzenberg—or his decorator or his stager—set off a staid quartet of masculine brown leather club-type chairs with an eclectic collection of contemporary artwork that includes several colorful skateboard decks painted by A-list artist Takashi Murakami.

The glossy, ebony wood floors continue in to the open-concept kitchen/family room that opens through a bank of French doors to the fairly petit backyard and detached two car garage. The children will note the long work island that separates the kitchen proper from the family room lounge area is dressed with a ubiquitous orchid plant and an impressive cluster of clear glass jars filled with candy. Candy. Yum. We're sure the kitchen is lovely and well-equipped but we can't get past all that candy.

Both the kitchen/family room and the master bedroom open up to the backyard where a small patch of grass divides the house from from an elevated, open air pavilion fitted and kitted with a spa and fire pit plus the extra added conveniences of a changing room and a bathroom.

Your Mama's brief and unscientific research shows Mister Katzenberg upgraded his living situation in January (2013) when bought a newer, larger, and Hollywood pedigreed pad in the Sunset Strip area with a big of a Tinseltown pedigree (above). Property records show the thoroughly renovated and partly restored 1930s Monterey Colonial residence—located just a third of a mile up the hill from his old house—has 4 bedrooms and three bathrooms and was sold by screenwriter and producer Simon Kinberg for $3,450,000. Mister Kinberg, in case his name isn't familiar, wrote and produced the Oscar nominated Sherlock Holmes movie with Robert Downey Jr., penned and produced at least two installments of the X-Men franchise, and is currently at work on Star Wars Rebels, the seventh installment of the ongoing Star Wars series. Previous to Mister Kinberg the house was owned by the Ice-T's long-time manager Jorge Hinojosa and the late Caresse Henry who at one time or another managed the careers of superstars like Madonna, Ricky Martin, Jessica Simpson, Paula Abdul and Joss Stone.

As far as we can tell from a perusal of property records, scruffy-faced Mister Flagg still owns the 1,300 square foot, mid-floor two bedroom and two bathroom condo crib at the full-service, I.M. Pei-designed Century Towers complex in Century City that he co-purchased with his parents in June 2008 for $1,048,000.

Just for shits and giggles, lets have a kick recap of some of the recent real estate doings of young Mister Katzenberg's wildly right media mogul father whose real estate portfolio has been in flux the last couple of years. In February (2012) Poppa Katzenberg and his long-time missus, Marilyn, sold their nearly 10,000 square foot faux-quoined mansion in the flats of Beverly Hills—listing details generously called it a "Contemporary Mediterranean"—in February for $9,283,500 million. In August the Katzenbergs put their luxurious, 14,100 square foot faux-rustic ski-in/ski-out chalet at the Bald Eagle Club in Deer Park, UT, on the market for $20,500,000. As of today it remains on the open market at the same price.

The elder Katzenbergs still own the Gwathmey Siegel-designed compound on Malibu's super-swank Carbon Beach where former Yahoo! CEO Terry Semel recently sold his Michael Graves-designed compound a few doors down to property mad gajillionaire Larry Ellison for $36.9 million, which should give y'all some idea of what the Mister and Missus K's beach compound is worth..

In October 20009 Mister Katzenberg paid ballistic missile tycoon Si Ramo $35 million for a supremely sited 6.34 acre spread on a private promontoary above Beverly Hills. He proceeded to knock the existing 8,700 square foot house down and build a bigger, newer, better, whatever house.

listing photos (old): Lee Manning Photography for Hilton & Hyland
listing photos (new): Coldwell Banker

Husband, Help for the House Bond

HUSBAND
House band
Under a lot of stress
Supposed to be a lot of things
Because he loves wife and family
Always to be depended upon
Not permitted to be down or domineering
Daddy, encourager, and provider.
These are just some of the roles
Some of the emotions
That go with being a husband and dad
Feelings glad, sad, and mad
He-motions often not communicated
Not desirous nor even welcomed
Nevertheless such thoughts occur
Hurt, wound, and sour
The loving marital relationship
The ability for dad to nourish and equip
His kids to succeed in this dog-eat-dog world
Sometimes even dad feels devoured
Done in by life's circumstances
Chances that did not materialize
Into personal and professional advances
Nevertheless he continues to believe
Move by faith and take chances
To advance himself and his family
To be all he can fully be
To do all he can in his power do
To say to his family, "I love you."
Sadly however many times
The house bond comes up empty handed
Complaining and ingrateful wife and kids
Demoralize him, taking from him his will to live
Of course their effect on him is often unknown
Because bid daddy endures a lot
And rarely is it visible or outwardly shown.
Therefore here is an encouraging poem
To uplift and help the house bond
The happy and unhappy husband
To salute the dad who endures a lot
And in his own life, feels like he's not got
Nevertheless he gives and gives some more
Hoping one day that God above will open the door
Enabling him to enter and fulfill his own dreams
Often are there times when Dad too wants to scream
Yet he presses on and tries not to be mean
To exemplify love and leadership
Endear his wife and not demean
She to whom he said, "I do" to
Lest she degrade and hurt him too
For Mom undoubtedly has her own struggles
And she needs lots of affection and snuggles
As for Dad he is pulled on often
To provide this, that, and the other
Certainly there are times he feels smothered
If he works at home interruptions can bother
Yet intrusions don't register when you need your father
Kids rush in to speak to dear old dad day and night
After all father knows best and can make all wrongs right
The pressures of life surely if one's not careful
Could drive Dad out of sight
Because even the house bond
Has his own fight
To stay mentally sane
In an insane world
To be a man of integrity
And uphold his word
Children hold you to promises
As do many demanding wives
Some even maneuver and manipulate
To get hubby to revolve around their lives.
Be encouraged man of God
Heaven sees and does realize
Your labor of love is tough
Never to be despised
Stay the course
Don't divorce
Don't abandon ship
Don't be disheartened
By a rebellious kids
Who make you livid.
Whenever you feel angry and alone
Know for sure you've got a home
In heaven up above
Where resides the Father of love
Who feels and cares deeply
About and for all you think of
Therefore find a friend in the Father
The Father of fathers can nurture
Who always understands
Never does ridicule or reject
On the contrary, He does wholeheartedly
Protect, comfort, encourage, and empower
Every wear man any day or hour
When called upon He is near
Every prayer you utter He does hear
As you seek Him, He will draw near
Slap success on and bless your year
Delight in you and call you dear
Do away with what you've been going through
Embrace, hug, undergird, and uplift you
Nourishing and nullifying negativity
Replacing anxiety with peaceful tranquility
Removing hardness of heart and rigidity
Loving and laughing with you
On your personal journey to liberty
The pursuit of happiness in your life
Take time for yourself away from strife
Let not others words cut you like a knife
Reposition your focus and perception
Discern demonic influences
Distinguish and wisely make a separation
From people and their outside influences
Pray fervently and overcome circumstances
Break forth into joy, turning sorrow into dance
Consider time with God a divine romance
You're going to make it husband
Don't leave destiny up to chance
It's a matter of choice. Therefore rejoice
For a new day has dawned
Newness of life has spawned
Super Dad is going to bounce back
No more will your soul suffer lack
Though you had been secretly under attack
And you have been catching flak
Your heart the enemy had thought to hijack
You however are going to fly higher
And mount up with wings like an eagle
Adjust inner attitudes and be regal
Relatable but not deflatable
Empowering but not disempowered
Sympathetic but not pathetic
Resourceful but not prideful
Patient but not a pushover
Persevering but not impetuous
Generous but not delirious
Balanced but not bamboozled
You're going to gain insight and revelation
Transcend, ascend, and make amends
Even sometimes father your kids friends
Embracing and endearing them
Connecting, communicating, and correcting
Assuring and facilitating learning
Loving, living, and laughing
Ecstatically celebrating
Each and every moment of the day
For father you set the temperature
Your pulse and passion paves the way
Therefore be courageous and say
That which is necessary and prudent
House bond be bold and not hesitant.
Therefore impart your heart
Deposit your discipline and ideals
Instruct with examples, chores, and drills
Expect reactions to be far from thrills
Yet know once they reach adulthood
Your kids will return to see Dad and chill
To hug, kiss, and reminisce
Therefore lead your family with all diligence
For this is your legacy and brilliance
Eerily it often feels like evanescence
The loss of your own precious life
Yet the more of it you give away
The more will come back to stay.

Paul Davis is a FL real estate professional, life coach (relational & professional), worldwide minister, and change master.
Paul is the author of several books including Breakthrough for a Broken Heart; Adultery: 101 Reasons Not to Cheat; Are You Ready for True Love; Stop Lusting & Start Living; Waves of God; Supernatural Fire; Poems that Propel the Planet; and God vs. Religion.
Paul's compassion for people & passion to travel has taken him to over 50 countries of the world where he has had a tremendous impact. Paul has served in many war-torn, impoverished and tsunami stricken regions of the earth. His Dream-Maker Inc. is building dreams, breaking limitations & reviving nations.
Paul's Breakthrough Seminars inspire, revive, awaken, impregnate with purpose, impart the fire of desire, catapult people into a new level of self-awareness, facilitate destiny discovery and dream fulfillment.

The Book's Big Day!

"How was your day?" Mr. Wonderful said closing his car door.
"…yeah," I said meeting him on the driveway.
"Your wine book came out today, right?"
"…yeah."
"So was it good?"
"…yeah?"

I'm a writer. I've written millions of words in blog posts, articles and the comments sections of kitten youtube videos but on this day I was having a hard time finding words to describe how I felt about my wine book, Evolution of Wine Drinker, coming out. The technical term for this is "verbal writer's block", which I'd learned about in the magazine "Writer's Neuroses Monthly". WNM published studies about it detailing its harmful effects, which included writers: spending even more time alone, cursing Earnest Hemingway for making the writing life look so easy and failing to finish a single Sudoku puzzle without collapsing into tears. Two studies said that a number of writers suffered permanent verbal writer's block, specifically citing: Thomas Pynchon, J.D. Salinger and Snoopy of the "Peanuts" comic strip. 

However, Mr. Wonderful was not about to let me off the hook that easily. He pressed on.

"Did people like the book cover?" 
"I got some LOLs."
"That's great!" he said. "Did people like your book?"
"Some already bought and read it." 
"That's really great!"
"--and said they liked it."
"That's super great!" Mr. Wonderful said jumping up and down giving me high fives like a trainer to his boxer before the latter climbed into the ring. 

His enthusiasm was contagious. He was right, all these things were great but I'd just needed someone outside myself to say so.  As a writer I'd spent so much time alone, with my nose to the grindstone, working, that it was funny--funny "different" not funny "ha, ha "--to have my book out there and being read by other, real people. I hoped they enjoyed the book as much as I enjoyed writing it. Actually, now that he mentioned it--everything about the day was pretty darn fabulous! This news about my book was great!

"This calls for a celebration," he beamed. 
"We will drink wine tonight!" I said "I've been saving a 2008 bottle from Grgich Hills for a special occasion like this, and how fitting that this year the winning Napa winemaker is celebrating his 90th birthday!" Once the words starting coming they did not stop. Apparently my verbal writer's block had been a very temporary condition.

Maybe I'll write "Writer's Neuroses Monthly" and let them know how I conquered my verbal writer's block. But first I'll pop open the bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon and toast to today, to wine, to how funny life is!--not funny "different" but funny "Ha, Ha, HA!"


My book, Evolution of Wine Drinker, is now available.

Oscar Winner Marcia Lucas Gives It Another Go

SELLER: Marcia Lucas
LOCATION: Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $3,499,000
SIZE: 3,200 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 3.5 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Last night's boozy, late night perusal of new listings in the Sunset Strip area of Los Angeles turned up an updated, upgraded and well-groomed traditional listed with an asking price of $3,499,000 and owned, as per property records, by semi-reclusive Oscar winning film editor Marcia Lucas.

She may be best remembered by (aging) Tinseltowners and Star Wars aficionados as the first wife of filmmaker George Lucas but in all truth Marcia Lucas can lay claim to a chest-puffing claim of a relatively brief but accomplished career of her own as a film editor.

Before hooking up with Mister Lucas in the late 1960s she worked on several Martin Scorsese films including Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore and Taxi Driver. In 1974 she received an Oscar nomination for American Graffiti, her first film with Mister Lucas. Although her role in the making of the first Star Wars movie is often over looked even by Star Warians—or whatever hardcore fans call themselves—Miz Lucas snagged an Academy Award in 1977 for her editing suite efforts on the ground-breaking sci-fi mega hit.

Miz Lucas went on to edit Episodes V and VI of the seemingly ceaseless Star Wars franchise (The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi) but her professional credits all but end abruptly in 1983,* the year she and Mister Lucus not-so-amicably divorced. There are reports ex-Misus Lucas was given a $50 million dollar settlement but, of course, Your Mama hasn't the faintest fact about what the real deal was. Anyways, Miz Lucas later married, made a baby with, and divorced a stained glass artist who had previously worked for her ex-husband. Awwwkwaaaard! Despite her high-profile first marriage and her professional accolades—she does have an Oscar for Star Wars, which her ex-husband doesn't even have—Miz Lucas lives a quiet and privileged life mostly out of the hot glare of Hollywood.

Property records show Miz Lucas picked up the Sunset Strip property that's currently for sale in October 2008 for $3,595,000. It's not clear to Your Mama if Miz Lucas ever occupied the premises—we found digital evidence from a few years ago that the property had been leased on a long term basis—and this isn't the first time Miz Lucas has mounted this particular bronco at the real estate rodeo; She had the house on the market for a couple months in the fall of 2010 with an asking price of $3,995,000.

Current listing information shows the white clapboard-sided 1930s East Coast traditional, set securely behind remote controlled gates and high hedges on a compact .2 acre lot just above the western end of the Sunset Strip, measures about 3,200 square feet with three bedrooms and 3.5 bathrooms.

There's a fireplace in the formal living room and in the formal dining room a bank of French doors connects through to the backyard entertainment and recreation spaces. The custom, eat-in kitchen has white Shaker-style lower cabinetry, rustic, rough-edged limestone (or some other stone) counter tops, glass fronted upper cabinets, (delicious) milk-chocolate colored subway tile back splashes, and high-grade commercial-style stainless steel appliances.

The media room/den adjoins the formal dining room and connects back through to the formal living room allowing for wonderful circular flow of chi throughout the ground floor. Although the staging is typically ho-hum the airy, sun-splashed room manages to strikes a difficult-to-achieve balance between grand and cozy. The vaulted, partly glass ceiling is anchored by a chunky, stone-faced corner fireplace and built-in book shelves add an air of literacy to the booze lovers two-stool walk-in wet bar. A flat screen television was hung very low for optimal viewing angle from the opposite sofa and Palladian-style French doors make and elegant egress to and from the red brick pool terrace.

A curving staircase climbs to the second floor where there are three bedrooms and three bathrooms, as per listing details. The smallest bedroom has private access through French doors to a roomy terrace that over looks the backyard and the second bedroom, a junior master suite really, has a sitting area with fireplace, built-in dressers tucked into deep window bays, a walk-in closet, and an attached three-quarter bathroom done up with a whisper of era appropriate Art Deco style.

The master suite doesn't have a fireplace—at least as far as we can tell—but does have a steeply pitched vaulted ceiling, a short, closet-lined dressing hall, and a modern-minded bathroom slathered in graphically veined marble and outfitted with a free-standing soaking tub and a separate, steam-equipped party-sized shower.

The backyard isn't especially commodious but it is, children, well organized, well equipped, and ringed for privacy by mature shade trees and towering stands of bamboo. There's lots of brick terracing with distinct lounging, dining, and sunbathing areas, an outdoor kitchen with built-in barbecue, a pool-side fire pit, and a sunken spa. There's pretty puny patch of lawn tucked into that back corner that is desirably flat but—let's be honest, children—is barely big enough for a couple of long-bodied bitches like our Linda and Beverly to really put on their play bonnets.

In all honesty, Your Mama isn't really sure where Miz Lucas currently resides but we did find plenty of evidence in various property record data bases that reveals she dabbles regularly in the buying and selling of multi-million dollar properties, mostly in Los Angeles, San Francisco and Hawaii.

In January 2005 she shelled out $6,950,000 for an ocean front house near Kapalua in Lahaina, HI that records indicate she still owns. In late 2002 Miz Lucas paid publishing heir turned internet entrepreneur and Silicon Valley venture capitalist William R. Hearst III $3,950,000 for a five bedroom and 3.5 bathroom shingled contemporary in San Francisco's posh Pacific Heights hood that she sold in August 2011 for $5,250,000 and in July 2008 she coughed up $5.2 million for a multi-story residence with more than 5,700 square feet on a double wide lot in the Clarendon Heights neighborhood that property records reveal she sold last October for $4,086,000, a beefy loss of $1,164,000.**

*The Internet Movie Data Base shows Miz Lucus executive produced a little known film (No Easy Way) starring Khandi Alexander in 1996 but that seems more an anomaly than a re-entry into show business.

**Miz Lucas, dear hearts, just might be one of the few who have lost money in the last 10 or 12 years in the electrified real estate game in San Francisco. Good grief. The fast-moving market in San Francisco barely even noticed the spectacular, economy ruining subprime mortgage melt down fiasco in 2007/'08. What little property prices might have dropped quickly rebounded and rocketed off in the other direction. 

listing photos: Rodeo Realty